Haikus for the Hard of Aging

Earl Fowler

10. Hairline’s on a trip, I blink, and it’s gone for good, Wrinkles take a bow.

9. Knees crack when I move, I swear they’re plotting revenge — hear their betrayal.

8. Memory’s slipping, I reach for my car keys — say, Where did I park them?

7. Creaky bones, sore back, I shuffle to the fridge — wait, Why did I come here?

6. Once I was spry, fast, Now I’m an expert at naps — Zzzz snort fizz zzz zzz.

5. Grey hairs in the sink, Pill phials fill the cabinet, I’m craggy as KISS.

4. Young folks look at me, I smile, knowing the secret: What was it again?

3. Once I could stay up, Now my bed calls me at nine, Pee at eleven.

2. Hearing’s not the same, “Turn up the volume. Can’t hear!” Crap set from China.

1. Eyebrows are wild now, Growing like upside down bangs, I’ll let them have it!